Slipknot - Self titled: https://open.spotify.com/album/2dL9Q5AtIv4Rw1L6lKcIUc?si=-Blum-oRTc2DCnbDf11-_Q
By 1999 I had the start of a music collection, and by that I mean I had a bunch of tapes that had pirated albums on them and a few mixtapes. I was still discovering new music through my next door neighbour Daniel, but it mainly consisted of Korn, Marilyn Manson, Rage Against the Machine and the likes. Apart from the occasional Fear Factory or Sepultura song there wasn’t anything too out there. That was until I heard Slipknot.
Although I don’t entirely remember where and when I heard Slipknot for the first time, I would hazard a guess it was through Daniel and his older brother. I do however remember what song it was, it was ‘Wait & Bleed’.
I recall making the connection to Korn in a sonic sense. It was raw, unnerving and...weird. Many years later I’d learn that they shared the same producer Ross Robinson. Coery Taylor’s vocals were unlike anything I had heard before it. His clean vocals amazed me, considering one second ago he sounded like an 12 foot fucking monster. I was told that there are nine (9!) members and they all wore masks and overalls. They lit each other on fire on stage and beat the shit out of each other while playing these chaotic songs.
Sounds (sic)!
... (I’m allowed one dad joke per blog).
I decided I needed to investigate this band more and I somehow acquired their album on cassette. I reckon this is the first band where I absolutely loved half the album and struggled with the rest. My taste at that point wasn’t quite up to the task of getting through the whole album. It was also my first attempt at liking music which had hints of extreme metal in it. I must admit that I do not really have a strong memory or connection to this album (bar one but we’ll get to that). It’s a lot of my friends favourite Slipknot album, but I always connected more with Iowa. That said I absolutely loved half the album. All the hits were on constant rotation, (sic), Wait & Bleed, Surfacing, Eyeless and Spit It Out. I also really liked Purity and Liberate, with Liberate becoming a personal favourite over time.
They were unlike anything I had heard at that point. It was beautiful chaos. They would go from hectic, off the chart speeding verses, into stadium filling choruses all within the same song. Everytime I thought about turning it off, they'd manage to pull me back in. The uniqueness of them was something I couldn't turn away from.
Both are the originals, with only the cassette case that has been replaced.
At some point I got the ‘Spit It Out’ single on CD. It had a live version of 'Wait and Bleed' on it and like every CD back then, it was a multimedia disc. This meant you could put into your computer and watch the Spit It Out film clip. I remember thinking it was a cool clip. It was a homage to the movie 'Shining', which then peaked my interest in the movie. Its a pretty shitty clip watching it now, but hey, I thought it was cool back then!
*Side anecdote*
I do have quite a funny memory with this song. I used to have a close friend named Adam and he played for our biggest rivals (this is in soccer). Before kick off we were both stood near each other, I smiled letting him know it was on.
He casually walked over. We stood toe-to-toe and he started screaming the chorus of Spit It Out in my face. I was so confused and didn't know whether to laugh or to be scared! I laugh now thinking about his face screaming at me. Fuck he was a weirdly beautiful guy...
Anyway back to Slipknot, I would then receive something that would push Slipknot into the higher echelons of bands I liked. That was the VHS of ‘Welcome To Our Neighbourhood’.
Watching this video opened my eyes to the mayhem that they were. It gave me a whole new perception of their music and what music as a whole could be. I had heard the stories and seen the photos but to see footage of nine (god damn 9!) horror movie monsters fucking up a stage while somehow managing to bash out the songs was incredible to see. The shitty quality of the recording just added to the disorder and horror movie-esque image of the band. The plastic covering half the screen used to annoy me but it was all part of the aesthetic, and that was the other thing, they had an image. These guys seemed to try and create their own world, and I wanted to be apart of it.
I cannot remember what happened to my VHS, however I did buy the dvd to replace it.
The one proper connection or memory I have of this album actually took place a few years later. It was 2004 and I was doing my English exam. I don’t remember the exact wording of what I had to do but I had to write a creative short story. I was in a pretty shit mental state for a teenager. Nothing serious but I wasn’t right, I had broken up with my girlfriend, stop speaking to some of my closest friends and was just not well. I vividly recall sitting there staring at the blank page having nothing to write and for some reason the song ‘Surfacing’ popped into my head. I kept singing to myself one lyric...
Fuck it all. Fuck this world. Fuck everything that you stand for.
I decided to base a story around that lyric. I’m not gonna write the story, as I obviously can’t remember it word for word (god fucking damn it time!) but I do remember the premise. It was about a teenager who was bullied. It eventually got to a point where it was unbearable, he couldn’t take it anymore. He decided he was gonna do something drastic. He left a note in his bully’s locker. It read...
Fuck it all. Fuck this world. Fuck everything you stand for.
He then drove his car off a cliff. Dead.
A few years later the bully hears about an upcoming band. He listens to their hit song and the chorus of that song went...
Fuck it all. Fuck this world. Fuck everything you stand for.
Did the victim fake his death? Was it some weird coincidence? Who knows cause that was the end of the story.
Pretty morbid, right?
I thought it was cool. Cut me some slack, I was a teenager, but it was a story with a twist and I figured no one else would've written something that dark.I guess in my haze of heartache/depression my train of thought just went a little diseased. The school certainly thought something was wrong with me though, as a few days later they called me into the councillors office to have a meeting. I had to explain that it was a creative story, the point being it was fictional. I made it up, it wasn’t based in reality and certainly didn’t reflect me or my thoughts. Im fortunate enough to have never been bullied at any point in my life, ever. It took some talking and explaining for them to believe me. Looking back I was lucky to attend a school which took such notice, but at the time I had no idea why they thought it could be reflective of my actual thoughts. Once it was established that I was fine I was free to go.
Anytime I hear this album and most specifically the song Surfacing, I recall this period of my life. That year was the beginning of a couple of hard years for me, filled with a lot of growing up. The anarchy of that self titled album somewhat captures those years.
I passed that exam by the way and a few months later I moved to Adelaide to get away from my perceived problems in Mt. Gambier.
Looking back, I guess there was a form of truth in that story.
The need for escapism.
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